The Buddhist Paradox

I am dissatisfied with my current environment. My friends all live too far away, the traffic is horrible, and the attitudes are unfriendly.

The common wisdom among my friends is, "live in the now", "love what is", "let go of demanding things of life", "desire is the cause of suffering". I do find a wisdom in this philosophy, but at times it is hard to pin down.
 

However, I also know that without dissatisfaction, I will not be motivated to change my environment. When we can see another way of living in our imagination, that is the point we start to become dissatisfied with the current moment. It is this dissatisfaction, this refusing to put up with second best, that often is the motivator for taking action and improving our life.

Yet, experiencing the dissatisfaction while doing nothing about it is a recipe for misery.

It is surely natural, and I would think, healthy, to feel dissatisfied when our needs are not well met. The animals certainly experience this. Yet it is also obvious to me that I do create much of my own misery by demanding so much of the universe that it is unlikely I will ever get what I want. And if I did actually get what I want, would I raise the bar and demand yet more? Am I set up for permanent dissatisfaction, no matter how wonderful a life I have?

So, I often ask myself, where is the line? When do I try to let go and be satisfied with what is, and when do I allow the discomfort within me to grow to a point where I am willing to actually change my situation?

I can see that this line is dependent on several things. First, on what is possible. If I am missing a limb, or don't like how old I am, or I still want to be a rock star, lots of luck. The wisdom that is obvious to me is, accept where I am and what is possible, and live life to the fullest within the parameters given me. These are the cards dealt to me, and it is not in my power to change them.

However, if I have the world before me, and I have plenty of money, energy, intelligence, creativity, courage, and whatever else it takes to move forward, I may very well act, and perhaps without a lot of thought or struggle, making use of the tools I have, so that I can live a richer and fuller life.

When the task before me is difficult and success is uncertain, then how do I know in which direction to apply my energy - work to let go of my desire, or build determination to accomplish it?

It is in this limbo that I often find myself - I am dissatisfied, yet doing nothing about it because of the daunting nature of the solution. Yet I am afraid to let go of my desire, because it is my only hope of change. If I look back and see that I had it within my power to live a much more satisfying life, and I didn't take it, how will I feel about myself?

I find myself wracked with desires, dreams, hopes, creative possibilities. I see ways in which life could be lived, society could be more supportive of human values, relationships could be closer and more satisfying, yet the things I dream about are usually so big, they seem out of my reach. It almost becomes a torment to dream of something good, because of the anger I then experience from the world not being that way today.

How do I love the current moment, and also live my life fully?